All I Asking For Is My Body - Part III

Choose a quote from the book and share your critical thinking in response.

“Oya ga ko wo shippai sase ta kana?” (Has the parent made the child fail?) ~ (Murayama 89)

     Kiyoshi’s father feels guilty for putting his debt burdens on his sons, just as his own father (Kiyoshi’s grandfather) had done to him. He feels as though his children may not have a brighter future if they must continue to work long hard hours, paycheck to paycheck to pay off the family’s debt. And because of these debts, Tosh and Kiyoshi must help the family pay it off but will fail to have a debt free future.

     Kiyoshi’s father does not want to present himself the same way as his own father; passing the debt generations down and having no success to paying off the debt. He portrays himself as a much stronger and supportive man in the family and must tend to them during sick times and illnesses. Those times are when he is held back from going out to sea to catch fish to sell; it’s the family’s bread maker (income). Just as Kiyoshi’s father had said, fishing is a gamble, twelve hours of work a day and lose money. This would be the very reason debts are difficult to pay off. Knowing he’s the one who provides for the family, it’s hurtful to him that the children have to be there to take care of the stress and burden after they (the parents) are gone.

     I can relate my parent’s to Kiyoshi’s father. Growing up in a small Podunk town with no jobs available, both my parents had to go mushroom hunting during the summer and fall seasons. What they find is what they sell. And just like fish, the better the quality the better the pay out. The hard part is they must drive two hours every single day to the mountain forest, and put in ten to eleven hours of almost non-stop walking and trailing to hunt for the right mushrooms to sell. And just like Kiyoshi’s father, we must use money made from prior day’s work to purchase gas, food, and seasonal tires every so often to manage the dirt roads in the mountains; it takes money to make money. My parents were never in debt, but because there were no jobs for them, they had to find ways to maintain a normal living life for us by going out of their way and do farming and hunting jobs seasonally. I would sometimes go out to the mountains with them just so I can help them pay for bills. I started helping my parents out since I was 9 years old until I graduated high school. I felt that because they are my parents who have supported me all my life, I must in return help them do the hard labor to keep a roof over our head. 

All I Asking For Is My Body - Part II

Why does Kiyoshi believe Obaban is a substitute for his mom?

     During his mother’s illness, Kiyoshi had brought up (bachi) or retribution; in other words, revenge or karma. He felt his family had done nothing bad enough to deserve punishment. Kiyoshi’s mother is a very superstitious woman. she explained to him that a person who did something wrong during a lifetime does not necessarily have to be the one who gets punished for their mistakes, but a close family member may suffer as a substitute in the wrongdoer’s place.
     According to the conversation Obaban had with Kiyoshi, she explained to him that if his mother believed enough in the superstition of a being a substitute she can be relieved of the punishment only if she can find another substitute. It so happened coincidently that Obaban had passed suddenly the next day, which made Kiyoshi believe that his mother had pass the substitution on to Obaban. “But Obaban was the logical substitute, she was old and lived a full life, Mr.Kitano and Anshan who was about thirty wouldn’t miss her that much” (Murayama 23). Kiyoshi felt guilty for feeling happy about Obaban’s death. Because he believed so much that Obaban was his mother’s substitute, it was the only way it would keep his mother well.
     I enjoyed this part of reading in the book. It reminded me very much of my own mother and grandmother. I’ve never heard of so much superstitious talk any more than anyone other than my own mother and grandmother. It must have something to do with both being so religious. In our language, karma or retribution is called mai. Though they do not speak in the same sense about bachi/mai as Kiyoshi, I was always reminded that anything I do wrong, any kind of punishment will come back at me. And I have always felt that was true only because I do not believe that bad luck falls on you alone, it has a sister called karma.